Let’s talk accomplishment.
In mid-August 2020, my friends ran a marathon. My husband joined them about 11 miles in and finished with them. As I sat with them afterward at the restaurant, eating burgers and drinking beer, I felt like I hadn’t earned what I was consuming or the camaraderie that was taking place.
I hate running. It’s hard. It’s boring. It takes so much time!
I was finished with my fitness hiatus. I needed to get back to moving my body, to feeling healthy. I started back at the gym and enjoyed taking it slow and rediscovering how well my body could move. But then, in September, we went on a week-long vacation with no gym equipment.
Consistency is the key to my success; I couldn’t NOT do something. I got on the treadmill – one mile. I could do one mile; use it as a “warmup” for the bodyweight movements I would be doing.
Day two – Well, I could do it again; it wasn’t That bad.
Day three – a mile and a half. Well, now it was kind of a thing. I ran every day, even for just a half mile here or 1 mile and a half there.
Over the next four months, I increased my miles to around three consistently.
In December, I ran my first four-miler.
In January, I agreed to run part of that same marathon my friends ran the previous August, only in June.
In February, I ran my first six miles; it felt good. Maybe I could do this, and I agreed to run the entire marathon.
In March, I ran my first 10 miles. I had begun to realize the joy of being alone with my thoughts and emotions as I ran for 2 hours. I realized I had changed. I liked being with me. I looked forward to it.
By the end of March, it became clear that my running buddy would not be running the marathon with me. This crushed me. This angered me. This demoralized me. Then; this empowered me.
There was no way I was going to hold back the faster runners in our small group. Facing some powerful demons and struggling with the pain of so many miles while your fellow runners are chatting it up is not something I wanted to do.
I would be running this thing alone.
My training changed. I began focusing on strategies to just get through the miles and reprogram my thought processes. I was going to have only me for 5 to 6 hours to rely on.
There were so many mixed feelings and thoughts over the last few weeks of training. As the day got closer, the fear grew. What was I afraid of? I Would finish; that was not the fear. It was those demons that scared me, the pain.
The day of the marathon came, and I was as ready as I could be for the amount of time I had to prepare. Our group ran the first 2 miles together through the tunnel. Then they were off, and it was just me.
One foot in front of the other, nice steady pace, catch another runner (pew pew), crank up the music, get lost in lyrics. Every song, every thought is rooted in memories. The miles slip by. My watch notifies me of encouraging text messages, and my heart leaps.
At mile seven, I see a familiar face smiling at me. My running buddy joins me for a couple minutes on the trail before peeling off, leaving me with words of encouragement and the determination to keep going strong.
Don’t forget to enjoy the view and the trees and the water. After all, beauty is more important than the run. Another text message, “You are strong and capable, keep going!!!” Yes ma’am.
At mile twelve, the pain joined me but so did that familiar friendly face, only for a minute, but it was what I needed just then. “You’re doing amazing! Keep doing amazing!” Then he was gone. Tears came to my eyes. No! Keep doing amazing!
The words became background noise to the pain. I just had to make it to mile twenty. My friend would be joining me for the end, supporting me, carrying me.
“There is only one way off this trail, and it’s through the finish line” Never once did I think about not finishing, about quitting. That was never a thing. Just don’t let the demons get to you, break you down. Don’t listen to them!
At mile 22, my friend joined me, and a notification told me the others had just finished their marathon. I had an hour yet.
Those last five miles were the most challenging, even after my friend joined me. I’m not sure I would have finished as fast or as strong without him there. The multiple text messages sent every hour meant the world to me and made such a difference even as the last few flooded in. I finished running strong across the finish line with a smile on my face in under five hours.
Let’s talk accomplishment. I did it. I ran a marathon. I am so proud of myself. Not just for the determination needed for finishing but for the determination for doing what I said I was going to do. Not just having the physical strength but also the strength of character to accomplish it.
I ran 20 miles solo, but I was never alone.
